Today in Commercials I Hate

One of the best things about having Hulu Live with No Ads, is all of the ads I get to see. Lately these commercials have been pissing me off, so I’m going to complain about them here. Starting with Subway.

I’m not going to pretend like I haven’t housed my fair share of meatball subs on Italian bread with American cheese before high school football games. Parmesan too please. Yes I’d like it toasted. But listen here, Scrubway. I don’t think you have much of a leg to stand on taking shots at burritos and burgers. It feels like Sue’s Salads trying to get a place in the Harvest Festival.

That’s not my problem though. If I consciously made the effort to leave my house and go to a nice park to eat my lunch, and then a ball came sailing from out of nowhere and knocked said lunch out of my hands and all over the ground, I would lose my mind. If I looked up and some asshole was smugly looking at me suggesting I get Subway instead, I would be writing this from prison. Luckily, I refuse to have any sort of social life or existence outside of my property.

I think I’ll get Erb’s and Gerb’s for lunch today.

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