Why? Because I hate this commercial.

I’m more of a Ford guy anyway, but I don’t understand the thought process behind making this shit. Let’s dig in, shall we?

As far as I can tell, there is a proud Toyota owner taking three of his friends to some concert. How kind of him. Probably made them pay for gas. They are late to the show, which is obviously this dude’s fault.

“Trust me,” he says.

I mean aside from making them late for the concert, why wouldn’t they trust him? Oh I know. The dollar oysters he made them eat.

“I don’t think those were oysters.”

“You survived.”

Alarming behavior, certainly, but if they weren’t oysters, what the fuck were they? Then some other friend pipes up.

“Wait, we can’t go that way.”

What? Unless I was driving through a militarized zone, I couldn’t imagine uttering that sentence to a friend. Get out of my car, dweeb. But in this case, everyone’s still supposed to trust this sociopath. God this commercial is so stupid.

“They’ll think we’re VIP.”

Of course they will, you’re driving a fancy minivan. Let’s set aside all of the other dumb shit that goes on in this commercial. Let’s also forget the obvious fact that driving a minivan is about as far away from VIP as possible. I don’t care what car you were driving (you probably wouldn’t even be driving in the first place). You could fly in on a helicopter. Doesn’t matter. These choads pull into a RESERVED spot in the back of the theater. The security people would obviously be expecting a specific person. Not a vehicle. A specific, particular person. Their name is probably on some piece of paper. But yeah these guys just rolled up in a Toyota Sienna and got first class treatment without anyone even looking at them.

Perhaps I’m overthinking this, but luckily for me I don’t care. This commercial is so stupid and I hate it. Now if you excuse me I’m gonna browse Car Gurus for a *new Explorer.

*used