It’s been a minute since I’ve studied my scripture, so I needed a little refresher on the order of the Ten Commandments. Not as straight forward as I remember. My word there are a lot of interpretations; the verbiage, the order, even the actual Commandments. I always thought religion was pretty cut and dried. Who knew? I found this list that seemed to line up the most with my recollections, so that’s what we’re rolling with today.
- 4. Honor thy father and mother. As a son I feel it is important to heed one’s parents. Number one by a mile. Something I hadn’t thought about until I was writing this is the fact that I am also a father. Weird coincidence.
- 3. Remember to keep holy the Sabbath day. Or as I always like to say, “Remember the Sabbath and keep it holy.” My interpretation of this was always you shouldn’t work on Sunday. I agree. I shouldn’t work. The Green Bay Packers should, but I shouldn’t.
- 5. Thou shalt not kill. I mean, yes? Seems like a pretty big one.
- 7. Thou shalt not steal. I like my possessions and would like to keep them, thank you very much.
- 6. Thou shalt not commit adultery. Speaking of possessions, what’s mine is mine, what’s yours is yours.
- 9. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s wife. You can have her. Your husband though, ma’am, is quite delectable.
- 8. Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbor. I don’t really know my neighbor that well, but there’s at least a reasonable chance that I would bear false witness against them.
- 1. I am the Lord thy God, thou shalt not have any strange gods before Me. Nothing against the Lord thy God, I just thought the other Commandments made a stronger case. Thor is pretty cool, though.
- 10. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s goods. Uhh, what’s the point of even living? Wanting what other people have is the only thing that motivates me.
- 2. Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord thy God in vain. Jesus Christ.
On a completely unrelated note, The Ten Commandments is an absolute classic. I am off to find a way to
illegally stream it.